Chapter 1

The story begins with Vilo Pants seated on a mantle-piece, embodying his usual detachment from reality. The narrator, Von Swine, sits at his feet, tugging at Vilo's shoelace with his teeth to keep him grounded. Inspector Squarkam bursts in, excitedly announcing a murder. Vilo incorrectly guesses Sergeant Teeth as the victim, leading to a wild and destructive reaction. After calming down, Vilo and Squarkam exchange blows, displaying their chaotic camaraderie. Von Swine corrects Vilo's grammar, receiving a beating for his efforts, before they head to the crime scene.

Chapter 2

At the crime scene, multi-millionaire Ezra Tunkett lies dead with his head battered. An infant in a cradle nearby eyes them malevolently while taking a swig from a bottle marked with three "X's." Vilo, demonstrating his deductive prowess, immediately suspects black magic. The infant, however, declares it's just good rye. Teeth asks what to do with the body, and Vilo orders it dumped in the ash-can. The infant then attacks Von Swine, knocking him unconscious.

Chapter 3

Vilo triumphantly announces he has discovered the murderer: the infant, who is actually Murderous Mike of Chicago. Vilo explains his suspicion arose from the infant's imposing size. The infant used a toy rattle made of Krupp steel to kill Tunkett. Vilo admits he confirmed his suspicion by reading the morning papers. The story ends with Vilo appropriating Von Swine's breakfast and a tip from Squarkam, while Von Swine marvels at Vilo's brilliance.