The Tom Thumb Moider Mystery

Introduction

“The Tom Thumb Moider Mystery” is a parody of murder mystery stories filled with absurd humor and exaggerated characters. The narrative follows a chaotic investigation led by Vilo Pants and his companions as they attempt to solve a bizarre murder case involving a mysterious corpse. From a letter to Tevis Clyde Smith, circa May 1932. 

Here is a short extract:

Thus I sang merrily as I shined Vilo Pants’ boots, while he watched me suspiciously from the chandelier. I had just spat carefully on the off-heel and was prepared to give it the final gloss with my shirt-tail, when a caulking mallet bouncing off my skull, made me aware that Vilo was seeking to attract my attention in his subtle way.

Detailed summary

Chapter 1

The story begins with the narrator singing a song while shining Vilo Pants’ boots. Vilo, perched on a chandelier, throws a caulking mallet at the narrator to get his attention and demands that the narrator include a footnote about a random fact to impress readers. This leads to a surreal sequence where the narrator imagines falling down an elevator shaft, resulting in a chaotic scene involving various historical and fictional characters.

Chapter 2

Vilo demands his shoes and threatens the narrator to produce a murder for the story. As they argue, a corpse falls out of a closet, prompting Vilo to scream for help. They call Squarkam and Teeth, who arrive to interrogate the corpse. Despite their efforts, the corpse remains unresponsive, leading to comedic attempts at extracting information from it.

Chapter 3

The narrator attempts to write Vilo’s genealogy, detailing the violent and absurd history of Vilo’s ancestors. Squarkam returns, frustrated by the corpse’s silence despite various torture methods. Vilo decides to investigate for evidence themselves, leading to further absurdity, including Vilo being knocked out by a disguised Max Schmeling.

Chapter 4

Squarkam believes he has found a clue involving a tough ten-year-old boy at headquarters. They use various torture devices to extract information, but the boy claims an alibi. Squarkam orders all witnesses shot, while Vilo expresses his frustration at the lack of clues. Suddenly, the corpse sits up and reveals that he had fallen into catalepsy after reading a boring book by John Riddel, solving the mystery in an anticlimactic and humorous fashion.

Characters

  • Vilo Pants: The main protagonist, demanding and self-centered, driving the investigation with his absurd methods.
  • Narrator: Vilo’s companion, often the target of Vilo’s frustrations and absurd demands.
  • Squarkam: A detective called to help with the investigation, uses extreme methods to extract information.
  • Teeth: Squarkam’s assistant, involved in the comedic interrogation of the corpse.
  • The Corpse: Initially believed to be dead, later reveals the cause of his catalepsy, solving the mystery.
  • Max Schmeling: Disguised as a little girl, knocks Vilo out in an alley.
  • The Boy: A tough ten-year-old interrogated at police headquarters, providing a false lead in the investigation.
  • John Riddel: An author whose boring book caused the corpse to fall into catalepsy.

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